In this first article in the series on Mental Health, exclusive on M3 India, Dr. Achal Bhagat writes on the pertinence of mental health especially during strange, unsure times such as now. He also provides self-care tips for doctors dealing with varied issues that may possibly be affecting their mental health during the pandemic.

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Hi, My name is Achal. I am a psychiatrist and a psychotherapist. It is my job to listen to people and help them cope in a manner that is helpful. It is also my skill to diagnose mental ill health and help people recover. Over the past few months, the word mental health has been used a lot, there is almost a glamorisation of the word.

Mental Health is not one thing, it is a diverse set of needs that people have. It is our need for dignity, meaning, control and togetherness. We all strive for it in our own way. Our mental health is reflected in our thoughts, feelings and interactions.

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How are you doing? I thought it would be good for us to talk.

I am starting this weekly column as a conversation about our own mental health and how we can look after ourselves. Each week I will take anonymous queries from colleagues. I do not profess to have all the answers, but I do promise to read all the queries.

I promise to see it from your point of view. I promise not to be judgmental or directive. I hope that what I have learned from being with people over the years will help us address some of the problems that come up. Regarding queries which I may not be able to address through the column, I will try to help you find resources to read or consult to help yourselves. As we grow and trust each other, we may even be able to form a community which can be our space to express ourselves without being judged.

Remember, you are precious! You are important to yourself. You are important to the people you love. And you are an important person for the people that you care for treat. You are precious, so it is essential to take care of yourself. All of us need to look after ourselves! It is an imperative.

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Unfortunately, there are myths about mental health and mental ill health. These myths lead to stigma and this stops us from looking after our minds. We have learned over the years that we may be seen as ‘weak’ if we talk about our emotions, especially because we are professionals who look after others. We are labelled as ‘warriors’, but we are human too! We too have thoughts and feelings. We too want dignity and purpose. We too are in relationships. We are parents, daughters, sons, and friends. We have identities and lives beyond being a doctor. We too are living in difficult times!

I do not know about you, but for me, life has been very stressful over the past five months. Everything has changed, yet everything is static. We have lost friends. We have lost purposefulness. Some of us have lost livelihoods. Some of us face lack of resources and helplessness. Some of us have faced violence and lost dignity. There is an overwhelming sense of worry, fear and uncertainty. Some of us are anxious, some angry and others depressed. Sometimes, it is difficult to find meaning in what one is doing when one sees the trauma that others are facing.

Yet, on the face of it, we are ‘normal’. While the images of pain have been benumbing and harrowing, we have learned to live like automatons. Going through the motions, one zoom meeting to another, one crisis to another! Sometimes, I get the feeling that for the last four months we have been living two parallel lives: in one universe, we are chasing a nostalgic past and waiting for our life to become as it was, searching for evidence that will help us feel protected, and in another, we have accepted that things will continue to be like this for the foreseeable future.

Here are a few tips to look after yourself this week.

Acknowledge your emotions

Some of the emotions that you experience may be grief, guilt, anger, embarrassment, loneliness, detachment and possibly others. Naming what one is feeling is helpful. It makes one’s experience of the feeling more understandable. Supporting people can be stressful! Caring for a person can affect you emotionally. It is a difficult balance between your needs and the needs of the person you are supporting. Acknowledging your emotions and needs will help you successfully cope with the person’s problems as well as your own.

Make time for yourself

We all spend most of our time solving problems. Sometimes we are solving our problems and sometimes we are solving the problems faced by others. Create a non-problem solving time for yourself, a time where you do not have to be a duty bearer to the whole world. What you want to do in this time is a choice that you have: you could make pots or just stare at the sky!

Contain your worrying

Worrying is natural in these uncertain times. Worrying about worrying is not going to help; It is when worrying gets overwhelming and almost paralyses you, that it is unhelpful. It is helpful if you can specify a time in the day when you will address your worries by making a plan for solvable problems. All the problems that not do not seem immediately solvable, let them be. You can come back to those problems later.

Accept your strengths and limitations

Accept that you have limits of knowledge, responsibility and energy. But also accept that you have strengths. Use your strengths to overcome your limitations. Your strengths and limitations arise from the way you think.

Learn to track your negative thoughts

You can track your thoughts by maintaining a three-column diary. In the first column, write the situation that made you feel upset. In the second column, write what you did in that situation. In the third column, write what you thought in the situation.

Thinking patterns

If you maintain a diary of your thoughts for this week, you will recognise that there are patterns in the way you think. Sometimes these patterns are helpful and at other times these are unhelpful. Some people generalise, some people think of only catastrophic outcomes; some of us personalise and many of us selectively look at what we cannot do or have not been able to do.

• Look out for early warning signs
• If you feel sad or worry too much
• If you withdraw from everyday life or avoid people or situations
• If you lack interest or cannot enjoy
• If you are angry and irritable
• If your sleep and appetite are disturbed
• If you have lost interest and are not able to enjoy
• If you are suspicious
• If you do repetitive actions and have repetitive thoughts
• If you have habits which are likely to harm your health
• If you face violence or abuse

Seek help

What are your thinking patterns? Are they helpful? If they are not, seek help to challenge and change them.

We are all interdependent. We all need help from each other to go forward in life. Value other people around you, treat them with respect, and seek support from them. If you are providing emotional support to someone, do not trivialise what they are going through by asking them to ‘pull up their socks and get on of it.’ Listen to them, do not pass a judgment on them, even if you do not agree with how they are thinking. Respect them for seeking help. It is brave to do so.

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Disclaimers

Your queries will anonymously form the basis of the suggestions offered in this column. This is not a crisis intervention service. If you are in a mental health crisis, please do seek support from your nearest mental health service provider.

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of M3 India.